"Desu-San-Desu" (Desu-San-Desu)
01/22/2016 at 16:23 • Filed to: None
2
18|
"Desu-San-Desu" (Desu-San-Desu)
01/22/2016 at 16:23 • Filed to: None | 2
| 18 |
See that white stuff all over the car and street?
That’s not snow.
Admittedly, there is a tiny bit of snow, including a bit more in the hour or so since I took this picture. But 90% of what is out there isn’t snow.
It’s ice. Ice and sleet with a few flakes of snow mixed in. First came the ice, laying a nice, invisible layer of “Fuck that’s slippery!” all over everything. Then came the sleet, which lays down a nice layer of hard, painful padding for the tiny dusting of snow to stick to.
The result?
Looking outside, it looks like there’s 2-3 inches of snow on the road and everywhere else. So you decide it’s okay to drive on because, in all honesty, snow really isn’t that hard to drive in. But you quickly discover that you have absolutely no traction whatsoever, because camouflaged under that dusting of snow is an ice rink.
And I guarantee you that when the evening news covers all of the carnage that results from this, they’re going to just gloss over the ice and sleet and say “Look how stupid people in the Deep South are! They can’t even drive in 2 inches of snow!” And those viewers who don’t live here are going to point and laughlike they always do without having an inkling of understanding of one simple fact:
We here in the South never get snow. No, 99.99% of the time, we get ice and/or sleet, then
maybe
some snow on top of that, like a false security blanket covering up a bed of rusty nails. Even winter tires can’t help you with that, unless you have studded tires. But nobody here ever buys studded tires, since they are expensive and we would only ever use them for a couple of days out of each year. That rarity of use is also why we apparently only have 4 plows and 3 de-icing trucks to cover the entire state.
So I look outside and I say “Fuck that.”
I have no reason to go out in this shit. Ice and sleet isn’t even worth hooning on, unlike actual snow. I’m off work, since the store is out of power. We already have all the groceries we need at home, there’s fire wood next to the fire place, and I have absolutely no reason to risk the Mini or pull the Audi out of the garage and risk it.
Why? Because of other people. Even if I know how to drive in these conditions after living in New England for years, most of the people in my area don’t know how to drive in it. So even if I decide to traverse to the store or something for some ungodly reason, and even if I’m fine and having no issues with traction and vehicle control, there’s a very high likelihood that some asshole is going to come barreling around in a 4WD lifted pickup truck on mud tires and wind up sliding into my line and slamming into me. In that instance, I deal with the consequences of someone other than myself not understanding how to drive on ice that looks like snow.
And I simply cannot think of anything outside of my own home that I need badly enough to justify dealing with that.
P.S. - Don’t get me wrong, if this was actual
snow
instead of ice disguised as snow, the Audi would already be out of the garage with a spare gallon of oil in the trunk, sliding around a nearby parking lot.
sm70- why not Duesenberg?
> Desu-San-Desu
01/22/2016 at 16:30 |
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A quote from my rabbi one snowy day.
“I decided I wanted to go out and grab some coffee this morning. Then my Mini Cooper decided I didn’t.”
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Desu-San-Desu
> sm70- why not Duesenberg?
01/22/2016 at 16:32 |
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The Mini is fine, lol. I drove it in similar conditions last year to get home from work. But I have less than 200 miles on the clutch. I’m not going to subject it to these conditions while it’s still in the break-in period.
lone_liberal
> Desu-San-Desu
01/22/2016 at 16:35 |
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Ice is the worst. I’d much rather deal with 6 inches of snow than half an inch of ice.
Klaus Schmoll
> Desu-San-Desu
01/22/2016 at 16:39 |
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With all the Mini posts. How is the Windstar? Is it at least driveable these days?
And how are the boys doing? Did school get canceled for the day?
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Desu-San-Desu
> Klaus Schmoll
01/22/2016 at 16:44 |
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The Windstar is in need of a battery. The one that’s in it won’t even take a charge anymore. It’s also 3 years old.
And yeah, the boys are out today. School was cancelled this morning when it was obvious that we were getting ice instead of just snow.
DrJohannVegas
> Desu-San-Desu
01/22/2016 at 16:46 |
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The sipes cut into non-studded snow tires do help on the ice somewhat. (Not as much as studs, but better than block-tread tires.) We get ice conditions here in the frigid Midwest, too. But, I understand that winter tires don’t make a whole heap of sense for most living in snow-hit areas today.
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Desu-San-Desu
> DrJohannVegas
01/22/2016 at 16:49 |
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If there comes a point where I actually NEED to leave today, I’ll pull the Quattro out of the garage. It has all-seasons, cheap ones at that, but they are shockingly proficient in these conditions.
gin-san - shitpost specialist
> Desu-San-Desu
01/22/2016 at 16:59 |
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Three words: fuck that shit.
Perfect time to stay inside, have something warm to eat or drink, and wait until it blows over.
Brickman
> Desu-San-Desu
01/22/2016 at 17:02 |
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I’d wish it would ice in the deep south. I want to drive my traxxas slash and golf cart on ice :D Last time I seen ice here was in 2001.
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DrJohannVegas
> Desu-San-Desu
01/22/2016 at 17:04 |
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Forgot to ask in your original “sideways Audi” post: do you have wheel dollies? Have you considered a cheap Harbor Freight set or a DIY build? Makes spinning the car around the garage much easier...
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Desu-San-Desu
> DrJohannVegas
01/22/2016 at 17:24 |
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Eh, the amount of time it would take to jack the car up and put the dollies in place is more time than it would take to just drive the car into and out of the spot, haha.
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DrJohannVegas
> Desu-San-Desu
01/22/2016 at 17:28 |
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I’ve reached maximum laziness with jacking up the Golf for tire changes. Usually, I can get one whole side up from the front jack point, then slide a low stand under the rear. But, if doing the reverse of this:
makes sense, so be it!
jjhats
> Desu-San-Desu
01/22/2016 at 17:36 |
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Reminds me of last year but nobody mistook this for snow:
Dusty Ventures
> Desu-San-Desu
01/22/2016 at 18:43 |
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Just an observation, you complained about how us native winterfolk often make fun of southerners because we think they don’t know how to drive in winter conditions, then you said southerners don’t know how to drive in winter conditions.
...
Love ya, buddy
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Dusty Ventures
> sm70- why not Duesenberg?
01/22/2016 at 18:45 |
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I could modify that to “I decided I wanted to use our Super Duty dually to pull our stuck Caravan out of the snowbank. Then our Super Duty decided I didn’t”
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Desu-San-Desu
> Dusty Ventures
01/22/2016 at 19:06 |
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I’ll take that observation on the chin, sir. Well-noted.
My main issue is that of the news outlets not properly conveying the
actual
winter conditions we get down here and just referring to it as “snow”, like it’s the purest of Coloradan ski-slope powder.
I fully admit that my fellow Southerners are idiots when it comes to understanding how their driving habits need to change when snow or ice are a factor. Then again, I remember that being just as much an issue when I lived in P.A. and New England... :-/
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Dusty Ventures
> Desu-San-Desu
01/22/2016 at 19:44 |
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Most southerners don’t know how to drive in shitty winter conditions.
Most northerners also don’t know how to drive in shitty winter conditions, but they think they do.
KusabiSensei - Captain of the Toronto Maple Leafs
> Desu-San-Desu
01/23/2016 at 09:45 |
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I mean, why can’t we in the South just all buy ice skates and then just skate everywhere? It would work better than walking...
Until everything thawed out half way to work.